Also ... an obsession about accessing them ... somehow randomly but probably depending on the mood.
And do it ... whenever i want ... because ...
Well ... mainly because this is what i want.
Today ... i use the term parallel reality more as a metaphor ... and less into a spiritual way.
It's indeed related to my fantasies i dream and write about.
To my inner worlds.
To the emotional which is overwhelming me.
To the non ending process of over thinking.
Also ... a lot to love ... even if that actually means many times ... illicit love stories ... and all related to that.
But ... no matter what ...i have the guts to practice this process of self therapy in front of the public and tell the truth about all what i think and feel ... no matter how silly or even pathetic it might sound.
Why ...
Because ....
Well ... i keep writing.
I am a little bit confused ... and that makes me also confusing in front of the public ... but i don't mind.
So ... allow me to tell my story ... or better said stories
which are a lot influenced of the emotional balance i am always involved in.
Everything looking a lot like an illogical show ... being the clear evidence of the nonsense defining the human being.
But ... i guess all is ok ... and even if you'll judge me ... believing i am suffering of a weird unexplainable mental illness ... i assure you ... i'll make you smile.
Or even ... why not ... recognise yourself into the roles i am playing on the stage of this illusory reality.
I've started to write my first book at 16 ... but then ... realizing i could not publish it ... i've abandoned the idea of being a ... writer.
20 years later ... i've started to write again ... believing i will finally succeed ... but i've failed one more time ... not getting the success i was chasing for.
Another 5 years later ... i've started one more time to write ... but this time ... more as a therapy.
It's what i've defined as ... self therapy.
I was analyzing and defining lots of weird ideas ... that were a lot related to me ... and my own soul.
I totally forgot that i was chasing for success.
I was simple writing my thoughts ... in essays ... becoming this way ... maybe not a writer .... but what many define as ... an essayist.
This is not a poet ... and not a writer.
Or maybe is kind of a poet that is incapable of writing poetry ... but is still expressing his thoughts ... into a similar way ... as a poet.
And is not a writer ... cause have not the ability to write for too long time ... about the same subject.
But maybe i am not an essayist... either.
I am just an ordinary person ... that could be better defined ... as a thinker.
Analyzing ... and defining my life ... practicing this process called ... self therapy ... i started to understand life ... and the way to better paths which i should follow.
And i've wrote ... and wrote ... and wrote ... realizing one day that i've published tens of books .... not really understanding how the hell I've succeeded doing that.
Today i dare to recommend writing ... as a therapy.
I could even say ... it's a simple way of understanding who we are ... but also a process that could help us ... heal our souls.
I personally continue to ... write.
It's in fact ... a non ending story that ... at least for myself ... will probably continue for the rest of my life.
But over all ... i am glad ... i am doing it.
I continue my philosophical journey ... not being able to define myself for clear as a writer or an essayist... but ...
Well .... most probably... i am on a good path.
And ... i would dare to recommend to everyone ... all what i am doing today.