THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO SPECTACULAR FAILURE: A Reverse Coach's Handbook to Achieving Your Lowest Potential
About this ebook
A Reverse Coach’s Handbook to Achieving Your Lowest Potential
Tired of self-help books that promise to turn you into a morning-routine-following, goal-crushing success machine? So is Dr. Pessimist McFailure, PhD in Disappointment Studies. After twenty years of “research,” he has finally written the book the motivational industry never wanted you to read: the first complete, step-by-step manual for failing on purpose, and failing well.
Why fight your natural tendencies toward procrastination, self-doubt, and snack-based decision-making? Embrace them! This laugh-out-loud satire turns the self-help genre completely upside down, with twenty chapters of gloriously terrible advice, including:
The Art of Setting Unrealistic Goals — dream big, plan small, achieve nothing
Procrastination Mastery — why do today what you can avoid forever?
How to Quit Everything Spectacularly — and the fine art of self-sabotage
Advanced Excuse Creation — because “I’m just not a morning person” is only the beginning
Maintaining Your Comfort Zone at All Costs — it’s comfortable for a reason
Career-Limiting Moves, Relationship Sabotage, and Financial Irresponsibility — a professional’s guide to getting nowhere fast
Teaching Others to Fail — because every great failure deserves a mentor
Complete with fake testimonials, a “Failure Brand” workbook, and a stern warning for readers who accidentally find the book motivating (please consult a qualified procrastination specialist), this is the perfect gift for the friend who owns seventeen unread productivity books, or for anyone who has ever abandoned a gym membership with pride.
Smart, silly, and secretly reassuring, The Complete Guide to Spectacular Failure proves that sometimes the funniest way to feel better about your life is to read a book that promises to make it worse.
A work of humor and satire. Please do not actually follow this advice.
