Saltwater Magic

Unnecessary descriptions and lacks detail in parts where it might actually be important. ex: Describes that the evil lady is orgasming with evil plans describes her body in a hypersexual way. When you could have taken the time to describe why she's so dark and twisted, provide more backstory or something. 2) Evil guy is ripping off pure innocent ladies' clothes. I just am not sure why that was necessary to include, nor am i sure the commentary about the hunger of an evil monsters appetite being linked to a teet of milk. Above everything I understand, you probably aren't established, so I can forgive the inconsistency it takes time to develop your writing style to convey everything needed to tell engaging story but the sexist premise of some of it really is unappealing. Going forward as a man, I recommend reading some women authors or deconstructing sexist ideals while writing your next book to see where that is lacking.

Now this was Brilliant! Can't wait to hear one of your longer stories... 10\10